The Great Millennial Exodus: How Housing Costs Are Tearing Families Apart

The Illusion of Doing Everything Right

Imagine doing everything right. You grow up in Canada, the child of immigrants. You work jobs through high school and college, keep your head down, and save what you can. You land a degree, climb the ladder, and by your late 20s, you’re making over $100,000. Sounds like you’ve made it, right?

Here’s the catch: you live in a big city, your office job demands long hours, and you don’t own a car. Most of your paycheck goes to rent, groceries, and takeout because you’re working late. Now you’re 34, and the only home you can afford is three hours away from your job.

You can afford a down payment nearby, sure, but not the monthly costs: mortgage, utilities, property taxes, insurance, and maintenance. So much for the dream.

That’s not a sob story. That’s a pretty common millennial experience these days (if you don’t have the bank of mom and dad to support).

When Average Becomes a Luxury

There was a time when someone working at the local factory or teaching at the neighbourhood school could buy a home, raise a family, and retire with a pension. They weren’t rich. They were just… average. But that average life was enough. Now? That same lifestyle is gated behind elite income, extreme sacrifices, or decades of saving while living like a monk.

The bar has quietly moved. What used to be “normal” now requires millennials and younger generations to be exceptional. And that should worry all of us.

A Society Running on Empty

Because here’s the thing, when regular people feel like there’s no way up, motivation tanks. You stop striving. You start settling. Or worse, you get angry. Disillusioned. Maybe even radicalized. And when enough people feel that way, society gets wobbly.

We’re not just talking about dreams deferred. We’re talking about the erosion of the middle, the part of society that holds everything together. If only high performers can afford homes, start families, and build some wealth, what happens to everyone else? What happens to the people who bag our groceries, fix our cars, teach our kids, or care for our aging parents?

The Boomer Bottleneck

That brings us to the next part of the story.

Many boomers and members of the silent generation are sitting on accumulated wealth and delaying retirement, which makes sense. We’re living longer and, in many cases, staying healthier as we age. For the silent generation, being 80 and still independent has become fairly common. It’s reasonable to expect that boomers could extend that independence well into their 90s.

All of this is great and should be the goal for any civilization. This system should be celebrated. Ideally, it would be passed down and made accessible to younger generations.

But here’s the twist: if younger generations can’t afford to live near their aging parents or work in essential support roles: like home care, nursing, or community health, then who will be there to help boomers when they reach their 90s and need assistance with basic needs like medication?

At the same time, many boomers and members of the silent generation rely on their homes as a key piece of their retirement plan. But if younger generations can’t afford to buy those homes, who will they sell them to?

If even the highest-earning millennials and Gen Z workers are burned out, financially stretched, and quitting care-oriented roles, who exactly is left to support an aging population and help older generations “cash in” on retirement?

It won’t be robots. It won’t be outsourced.

Cracks in the System Are Already Showing

We’re already seeing the cracks, care homes struggling to hire, nurses burning out, and elderly people living in vans on the West Coast. And here’s a grim thought: as medically assisted death becomes more accessible, is it also quietly being accepted as a pressure valve for a system that can’t care for its aging population? (this is just a question)

This Isn’t Just About Fairness

This isn’t just about fairness or generational resentment. It’s about what happens when a society makes it nearly impossible for the average person in their prime to build stability. If the next generation can’t survive, let alone thrive, the whole system starts to fold in on itself, and everyone across all generations begins to suffer.

We need to rethink what success looks like and who gets access to it. Because when high performers can’t afford average lives, that’s not a personal failure.

That’s a systemic one.

More Cascading Effects (Food For Thought)

The Birth Rate Decline

Millennials aren’t avoiding parenthood because they’ve rejected family values. They’re postponing or abandoning it because they can’t afford stability. Without secure housing and manageable work hours, having children feels irresponsible. Birth rates have plummeted precisely in regions with the highest costs of living. (this obviously isn’t the only reason)

The Coming Labour Shortage

Fewer young people means fewer workers in essential positions. Local cafés, restaurants, and neighbourhood services already struggle to find staff. When small businesses can’t operate, they close. When corporations can’t find workers, they automate or relocate. The community fabric unravels.

Families Torn Apart

When millennials must relocate hundreds of kilometres away for affordable housing, they leave behind more than expensive real estate, they leave their parents and extended family. The intergenerational bonds that once provided emotional support and practical help break down.

Isolated Final Years

After decades of building a community, many aging Canadians may find themselves without children and grandchildren nearby. Not because younger generations don’t care, but because economic realities forced them elsewhere. The isolation this creates adds another burden to an already strained eldercare system.

These aren’t minor inconveniences. They represent fundamental tears in our social fabric with consequences that will echo across generations. A society that makes average life unattainable for high performers isn’t just unfair, it’s unsustainable.

Addendum

I just found this video where he explains that as a millennial, he was able to buy a home from a boomer who was a professional clown (it was a rental property).